Remember the day when you got married? Everything was wonderful because you were in love and were loved. Life was perfect as you expected a lifetime of wedded bliss and a life full of love and happiness. Your wedding promises were so meaningful as you looked into each others eyes knowing you would be together as long as you both shall live. You did not expect to be considering how to avoid divorce.

What happened? Now one or both of you is considering or threatening divorce. Wedded life is not what you expected and your boyfriend/girlfriend turned into a husband/wife. The love you once shared is never mentioned and indeed never felt as you drift farther and farther apart. You did not realize that being together for a lifetime could seem so long.

Sorrowful marriages are not rare. Unhappiness at times begins on the honeymoon and at times years later. It can come suddenly or creep up on you like old age. Most of us have stared in the mirror and wondered who that old person is. It's like that in wedding when you stare at your partner and wonder who that stranger is. Surely, that's not the person you got married to....

But it is and you can be in love and happily married all over again with a little combined effort. Avoiding divorce is possible. Do not even talk about the D word until you have given it a genuine try to revive the spark which was once there. Stare closely and I am sure you could see a little flame now.

You have probably been told that to have a happy marriage you must converse. So, begin with talking. Whatsoever has been at the root of your problems talk about them openly and wisely. What have you got to lose? Communicate and negotiate. A good life is understanding to compromise since it will not always go your way. Do not let the wind blow you away but bend a little.

Both of you bring to the talk table all the things you would like to see the other do to save the marriage. Do not only be negative. List the things that annoy you but even list things that give you happiness and make you smile. Take the list seriously and realize it today.

Do not permit the list limit your actions. Create ways to make your partner feel special and loved again. Tell them in a short note that you love and be glad about them via email or a phone call. They can be busy so do not linger. Say sweet nothings and leave them wanting more. Marriage should be pleasurable and filled with humor. You are more likely to live together if you giggle together.

Get closer. Touch each other. When you pass, kiss their neck or ear or squeeze their hand. Do things together instead of watching TV. Special interests together offer a chance to do more talking, bonding and remembering why you loved them in the first place. The bottom line here is to be friends and lovers. When respect returns so does love and when you love somebody you may avoid divorce.

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Remember when you got married? Everything was wonderful because you were in love and were loved. Life was perfect as you anticipated a lifetime of wedded bliss and a future filled with love and happiness. What happened? Now one or both of you is contemplating or threatening divorce.

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